Ah, dress speak. Apparently, I was supposed to know this stuff, even though my wardrobe consists mainly of blue jeans and turtleneck sweaters. So before I began shopping for a wedding dress - the wedding dress - I turned to bridal magazines and the Internet to find out what I was in for.

The best help I found at The Wedding Channel, www.weddingchannel.com, where the advanced gown search shows what each attribute (scoop neck, empire waist, ball gown, etc.) looks like, and lets you tailor a search for, say, all square-necked gowns, or all tiered-skirted gowns, etc.

I did find inconsistencies from magazine to magazine, or designer to designer, as far as describing a gown's attributes: Some included "empire" in waistlines, some put it in the "bodice" category, and still others placed it under "silhouettes." They all agreed on its description, though, which is really all that matters.

To help you decode the dress lingo, we've defined some of the basics: necklines, waistlines and shape (also called "silhouette"), and identified what style works best with what body type.

Of course, this is no substitute for trying on a bunch of dresses until you find the right one. No amount of magazines or Internet searches will reveal the important things, like does the fabric irritate you, or is that bow in the back a lot bigger than it is in the picture, or do you have to lift weights so you'll be able to carry around that bustle all day?

So you're ready to shop. Here, then, is what I learned, along with some tips from readers.

But what if you look and look and look and still don't find the gown of your dreams? Well, you can have one made, but do your research to find a reputable dressmaker. Kelly Bond offers these signs of trouble:

Alas, Bond says she found out her mistake too late. Her advice: Trust your instincts.

And a final tip: Buying a wedding dress is no small task; don't make a hasty decision. If you find one you like, compare it to others. Sleep on the decision. Come back after a day or two and look at it again. If you still like it, congratulations. You've found The Dress.