Philadelphia Inquirer columnist John Gonzalez jokes this morning that it's hard to dislike Milwaukee, but then he goes on to list five places to start.

Here is the link to his full column that gives Phillies fans five reasons to feel good about the National League Division series with the Brewers and five reasons to sweat it out and here are his five reasons -- pulled from that column -- to dislike Milwaukee:

Philly has always been able to work up animosity for other cities. Dallas, New York, Boston - pick the place, we can detest it. But how do you dislike Milwaukee? Milwaukee is the awkward home schooled kid of American Cities. It's the three-legged pound puppy of these United States.

Every conversation that begins with Have you been to Milwaukee? invariably ends with Yes, those poor people.

Not since the Hartford Whalers came to town has hate been this hard. We're going to have to work at it. Maybe these will help:

Bernie Brewer: After Brewers home runs, the mascot used to slide into a mug of beer. Now he slides onto a platform. The PC police have managed to make him even lamer than Mr. Met.

Onmilwaukee.com: No. 57 from Onmilwaukee.com's top 100 things to do while in town: "Milk cows at a farm." I'm not making that up.

Socialist politics: Todd Zolecki (the Phillies' beat writer for the Inquirer) is from there, bless his heart. He tells me that Milwaukee has elected three socialist mayors over the years. Three. Elect one, and maybe you can explain it by pointing out that the entire city was founded on beer, and the citizenry loves to partake. But three? No hangover excuses that, comrades.

Prince Fielder: He got into a dugout shoving match with a teammate earlier this season. Then, yesterday, he gave Dick Jerardi a hard time over a perfectly reasonable query. (Paraphrased question: What do you think of Ryan Howard's September numbers? Paraphrased answer: Grumblegruntnextquestion.) It's not like Jerardi asked about the now infamous pictures of Fielder celebrating by pouring champagne over his face. Speaking of: Are you having nightmares, too?

The sausage race: The best part of the sausage race was when former Pittsburgh Pirate Randall Simon clobbered one of them - the brat, maybe? - with his bat. Remember that? Best contact Simon ever made. Otherwise, no one ever wins at a sausage party.