This is the story of a shy, humble, unassuming newspaper columnist who in the summer of 2007 was contracted to write a book titled "Favre: His Twenty Greatest Games."

The publisher got in touch with the columnist because it was felt that 2007 would likely be Favre's last season. Nothing big was really expected of him or the Packers. The hope was that the Packers might win as many games as they lost and that Favre would make it through the season without getting hurt.

He would retire quietly and a book about his 20 greatest games would be a fitting tribute.

The columnist, because he is a humble man, hoped only for a modest success.

But then a funny thing happened. The 2007 season was magical for the Packers, and, especially, for Brett Favre. The Packers nearly made the Super Bowl. Favre was named Sportsman of the Year by Sports Illustrated magazine.

And then, this past March, just as the columnist was finishing his book, Favre tearfully announced his retirement from football.

The columnist, it must be said, began to have a little problem with humility.

"Can you believe this?" he was heard to say. "God is good! It's perfect timing. A dream scenario."

Others overheard him say, "How many copies did Harry Potter' sell? What's Oprah's phone number?"

The book was scheduled for fall publication.

The columnist said, "Will it diminish me as an artist to sell the film rights?"

When rumors began in April that Favre might be rethinking his retirement, the columnist was philosophical.

"He just needs something to get him out of the house," the columnist said.

In July, when it became clear Favre was coming back, the columnist tried to stay positive.

"At least his name is still out there in public," he said.

It was out there, all right. It was out there enough that it began to produce fatigue in almost everyone who heard it.

In August, when Favre signed with the New York Jets, the columnist scrambled and was able to write an epilogue to his book just before it went to the printer.

In essence, the epilogue said Favre will always be a Packer.

The book came out in September, and while Oprah was not returning the columnist's calls, it got off to a nice start.

Then, Monday morning, the columnist woke to the news that Brett Favre, in his anger at Packer management, may have called the Detroit Lions and offered suggestions on how to play better against the Packers.

Though Favre denied it, much of Wisconsin seemed stunned.

The columnist took it like the man he is -- on his knees, weeping hysterically.

"God hates me," he cried.

On sports radio, a caller accused Favre of trying to sabotage the Packers.

"He's sabotaging my book," the columnist said.

Now when the columnist goes to bed at night, rather than falling asleep dreaming about the oceanfront home in Maui he was planning to buy, his eyes snap open with nightmare headlines that might be coming any day.

"Favre: Deer hunting for wimps."

The story begins: "Brett Favre, quarterback for the New York Jets, today denounced deer hunting in Wisconsin and questioned the manhood of anyone who participates in the annual ritual.

"'Stalking the ferocious white-tail deer,' Favre said, his voice dripping sarcasm. Are you kidding me? They'd look dainty in those orange suits -- if their butts weren't so big.'"

Another headline:

"Favre buys condo in Chicago."

The story: "Former Packers quarterback Brett Favre has purchased a condominium in the trendy Lincoln Park neighborhood and announced he will join former Bears coach Mike Ditka as co-owners of a new Chicago restaurant called Titletown South.

"'Chicago is the real Titletown,' Favre said in a statement."

On bad nights, it's just swirling headlines, one after another:

"Favre, Moss to star in buddy film: 'Moon Over Cheeseheads.'"

"Favre speaks out on 'The View,' claiming, I never liked bratwurst.'"

"Minnesota Metrodome renamed for Favre."

"Favre: Vince who?"

During daylight hours, when it is easier to be rational, the humble columnist calms down and speculates that this story will somehow find a better ending.

After all, in every Hollywood love story, there is a bad moment when feelings are hurt and it looks like things will end poorly. Sooner or later, there is a tearful reconciliation.

Wouldn't it be nice if that was in the stars for Brett Favre and the state of Wisconsin?

And wouldn't it be nice if it happened before t

he holiday gift-giving season?

Contact Doug Moe at 608-252-6446 or dmoe@madison.com.